keep passing the open windows

There is a David Sedaris story that goes something like this:
“One summer my family was embroiled in a mystery. Someone was wiping his or her butt on our mahogany colored bathtowels and replacing the towels on the shelf, properly folded. At one point or other each of us was the victim and one [...]

Saturday night we (Taylor, Chris, Tay’s friend Wesley) were hanging out playing board games.
The topic of usernames came up. Chris said “My username on my fantasy league is Mike-Oh, I better not say.”
Taylor and Wesley started lauging hysterically.
Okay, what’s so funny about Mike? Mike What?
Chris finally admited that his username is [...]

Friday when I arrived home from work my husband was in the kitchen, wiping off the stove. I started talking about my day, but then he halted me, saying, “I can’t believe you didn’t notice that I had cleaned the counters and the stove top. You should have noticed and thanked me!” [...]

Last night my husband said:
“I was thinking about goals and I have come up with one. I would like to go to Monte Carlo to see the Formula One race in two or three years. I’d like to stay at a really nice hotel and go to the casino and be able to [...]

Last night, after having a talk with Taylor, Chris said “We should have another baby.”
I started laughing, thinking, “What about our son’s recent shitty behaviour makes having another one seem like a good idea?”
He had a reasonable explanation. “Well, I think we’ve screwed these two up too much, maybe we just need [...]

Have I ever mentioned that I’m hard to live with? For example, this morning:
Chris: “You look pretty today.”
Me: “Hmmm… so are you saying I didn’t look pretty yesterday?”
Chris: “No, just that you look pretty today.”
Me: “Well, that implies that yesterday I looked like crap.”
Chris: “Why can’t you just say [...]

My husband just emailed me:
“tonight, at some point, I want your body.”
My response:
“And you think I’m sexy?
Come on baby let it show?”
God, I’m funny….

Yesterday I wrote this entry, but didn’t get around to finishing it:
“For Valentine’s Day I wish I had:
a clean car
a clean bedroom
a clean bathroom
Noticing a trend? Apparently we are slobs. Especially me.”
Today I’m a bit sad because my husband didn’t get me anything, WAY WORSE, he didn’t do anything for the [...]

I was talking to a fellow blogger one day about blogging and anonymity. Once you aren’t anonymous, even to a few people, does it effect the way you blog? I think so.
For example, yesterday morning I was showering and my husband walked into the bathroom and hopped in the tub. [...]

I’m glad it’s Christmas vacation. Reagan is getting a break from her bullying situation. Hopefully that will blow over during the holidays. Maybe not, though, since the Tuesday before break the other child struck Reagan at school and we called the police…. I’m hoping that won’t make the situation worse, but [...]