keep passing the open windows

My boss: “Does Illinois have one ‘n’ or two?”
Me: (What? My boss was in the newspaper spelling bee for god’s sake and has lived in IL since she was five, is she totally brain dead today?)
“Um, one, Maria.”
MB: “Are you sure? That doesn’t look right.”
Me: “Um, yah, just one ‘n’”
MB: “No that’s not right, there […]

You graduate from 8th grade today, an accomplishment you seem to be taking in stride.
“Mom! It’s ONLY 8th grade promotion” was your exasperated plea when I ruled out basketball shorts, a white t-shirt and high-top tennis shoes for your graduation ensemble.
I’ve written about some of the less sterling parts of your middle […]

Saturday night we (Taylor, Chris, Tay’s friend Wesley) were hanging out playing board games.
The topic of usernames came up. Chris said “My username on my fantasy league is Mike-Oh, I better not say.”
Taylor and Wesley started lauging hysterically.
Okay, what’s so funny about Mike? Mike What?
Chris finally admited that his username is […]

I had a dream that I wrote this blog post:
“Men and penises, so silly. All that worry about size. Of all the men I slept with (pre-marriage, of course!), I don’t remember any significant differences.
Except for that one guy, he was pretty big.
Oh, yah…
and that one poor guy…”
*Actually, now that I think about […]

I had a nice Mother’s Day.
The highlight? One of my sisters text messaged my mom:
“Happy Mother’s Day! Sorry, can’t make it. Warrant out for arrest. Can’t drive. Love, M.”

I moniter my kids’ online activities, instant messages, cell phone usage, text messages, etc. They know it’s a part of being allowed to have an email address, having a Myspace page, and a cell phone.
Today I checked out my daughter’s Yahoo Answers! profile and looked at the questions she had answered. […]

Yesterday I had to take Taylor to the dentist for a follow up visit (cavity!). After signing him back in at the school, one of his teachers came up to me and said:
“What happened to Taylor’s hair?”
And she said it in the same concerned and bewildered tone one might use when asking someone about […]

Riding in the car yesterday Reagan said “Mom, remember when I went to that lock-in and the topic was abstinence?”
“Yah?”
“Well, one 6th grader asked ‘If abstinence is so great, then why are there prostitutes?’”
My son proclaimed this to be his new motto.
He wants to get bumper stickers and t-shirts printed and sell them; […]

Yesterday’s post was just an example of one of the “commonplace” conversations we have at my office that would be bizarre to others. Part of the feel of living and working in REALLY small town.
There is a one-armed man living in an “apartment” two store fronts down from my office. […]

I just said to my boss “I think the short, loud guy with the black dog is moving in with the one-armed man.”