Getting in the car this morning, Chris said “Reagan’s being grumpy.”
I replied “Wow, and she doesn’t even know the bad news.”
The kids both sat in the backseat, frozen with uncertainty. Finally, Reagan said “What ‘bad news?’”
Me: (nonchalantly) “Oh, Ms. B. called the other night and asked us to chaperone at the dance.”
Reagan was instantly in tears. Taylor muttered a grumpy “I don’t care.”
Then Reagan’s verbal barrage began:
“Why do you hate me so much?”
“You are the worst parents EVER!!”
“Why are you SOOOOO MEAN?”
Chris responded with the parental threat of “If you’re that upset, then maybe you shouldn’t go to the dance at all.”
That shut her up, for the remaining block or two to school.
Until it was time to bid her adieu. “Bye, Reagan, we love you!”
“Well, I don’t love you!!!”
Terribly, after the kids walked away Chris and I both cracked up. Her outrage, it’s so strident, so heart-felt, yet such an overreaction, it’s hard not to find it humorous.
Reagan is thirteen years old and I think it’s taken me that long to learn to cope with her emotional outbursts and not let it upset me, or to see it as a reflection of my parenting.
I’m sure pre-child, I thought “MY offspring will NEVER _________.”
But it’s not that easy, every child has his/her own innate nature with inherent qualities that I think one, as a parent, has to learn to cope with; for my daughter, it’s a tendency to be dramatic.
Not that we haven’t tried to temper Reagan’s “mouthiness;” we have, but we’ve only met with moderate success.
Oh, and on the “upside,” when Reagan’s happy, she’s a really joyous person to be around, full of laughter, fun, and good humor.
4 responses so far ↓
1
tsheets
// Feb 7, 2008 at 5:30 pm
When my daughter used to get all upset at me and exclaim that she hates me, or that I’m mean. I generally countered with “Love you, it’s my job!”
2
Secret Server
// Feb 7, 2008 at 6:11 pm
Sometimes I feel frustrated when my friends without children talk about how their children will never ……, but yes, I remember when I would have control over certain aspects of my kids’ behaviors or even personalities. It is so much better though that they are such unique individual people.
But I also remember being Reagan’s age and acting that way too. My mom must have been worried, but I eventually got over it…. I think.
3
diane vespa
// Feb 8, 2008 at 2:45 am
My son posesses all the restlessness and excitement craving tendencies that I did as a child. I now finally realize what I put my parents through. My Dad even admitted that he secretly gets pleasure out of watching me try to deal with his antics. Kharma, I say Kharma!
4
jenjw4
// Feb 8, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Diane,
Oh, yes, my mother used to say she might believe in reincarnation because of my troublesome sister Melody. Mel might have been payback from her deceased mother for her own troubled teenagerhood…
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